Student: Is that a Monopoly thimble?
Other student: No, it’s one of the new cafeteria cups.
Student *buys 100 flowers, sings romantic original song, and gets down on one knee*: Will you go to prom with me?
Other student: No. I wanted an ice cream truck like Jake.
Senior: Sorry, I wasn’t feeling too well so I couldn’t come to class.
Teacher: I’m only a PhD doctor, but this seems like a case of senioritis.
Student: This lunch food is bussin’.
Other student: I know right? When we got rid of DAAR we got rid of bland British food too.
Student: Why are we always so late?
Other student: Because we walk a 5K after every class.
Student: Bro, I have so much work. I’m cooked.
Other student: Let’s just thank the lord that we’re not in Horace Mann.
Student: Amen.
